I am a person who spends a lot of time with her thoughts & feelings. A lot of times, I become frustrated deciphering my thoughts to determine what is coming from my soul and what's negative ego bullcrap... And in the frustration, I ultimately feel like a failure. I've realized this process is counterproductive, as I began the inner reflection to get in touch and connect with myself.... to feel GOOOOOOOD, not to end up belittling and doubting myself.
This article from The Daily Om, "Letting Go of Understanding: Deeper Meanings" really put into perspective how putting all my thoughts under a microscope has distracted me from the connection I sought in the first place.
October 31, 2007
Letting Go Of Understanding
All of us who seek to be conscious and aware regard our experiences as teachers, and we try to discern what lessons we are learning from the things that happen in our lives. Sometimes the lesson is very clear from the get-go, and other times we have to really search to understand the deeper meaning behind some event. While this search often yields results, there also comes a point in the search where what we really need to do is move forward. It is possible that we are not meant to know the deeper meaning of certain occurrences. Answers may come later in our lives, or they may come as a result of letting go, or they may never come.
We are all part of a complex system of being, and things work themselves out in the system as a whole. Sometimes we are just playing a necessary part in that process with a result larger than we can understand. It may have very little to do with us personally, and while that can be hard to understand, it can also free us from overthinking the matter. Sometimes it is best to see it in terms of karma, a past debt we have been able to repay in this way, or as the clearing of energy. We can simply thank the event for being part of our experience and let it go. This completes the process that the occurrence has made possible.
To make this letting go official, we can perform a ritual, make a final journal entry on the subject, or sit in meditation with the intention of releasing the event from our consciousness. As we do so, we summon it one last time, honoring it with our attention, thanking it, and saying good-bye. We then let it go out the door, out the window, out the top of our heads, or into the earth through the bottoms of our feet, liberating ourselves from any burden we have carried in association with it
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This week I will connect to my inner spirit without doubting and questioning every aspect of the journey. I will let go of any aspect that does not lead to total happiness